Glossary of the new economics

????By Stanley Bing

????Debt: What you buy things with.

????Cash: Employed to buy debt.

????Profit: What’s left after Generally Accepted Accounting Principles takes the rest.

????Revenue: What you see in 120 days.

????Interest: What they used to give along with the toaster.

????Free Market: see Unregulated Market.

????Unregulated Market: See Ponzi Scheme.

????Ponzi Scheme: The manipulation of markets by experts who use other people’s money to get rich.

????EBITDA: See OIBIDA

????OIBIDA: Yet another acronym.

????Cash Flow: The actual amount of money an enterprise has on hand. Generally disregarded by Wall Street analysts in favor of Earnings Per Share (EPS).

????EPS: Cash that is left after the business does anything worthwhile. The figure is distorted by all sorts of one-time expenses, accounting tropes, write-downs, restructuring charges and other non-cash items.

????Capitalism: The manipulation of markets by experts who use other people’s money to get rich.